those ghastly little traps

[ewein2412]

Immigration official  Harbormaster:  Welcome to mainland Britain.  I see from your passport sword that you’re a writer you’re a knight.  What do you write?  Whose knight are you?

E Wein  Mordred:  Well, in fact, I write children’s books I’m a knight of Arthur’s Round Table.

Harbormaster: Going to be the next Sir Lancelot, are you?

An Editor  A damsel in distress:  I like this book but  I could use help, but not yours just now, even though Sir Lancelot has made knights of the Round Table so much more popular these days.

Librarian  Lady Enid:  How are you getting along in Camelot?

Mordred: I’m doing quite well, actually. Arthur’s acknowledged me as his son and he’s going to make me regent if he has to go abroad.

Lady Enid:  Oh, you're going to be the next--I can’t think of the name.  Something to do with a lake--

Mordred:  Spare me, sweet lady, DON’T SAY IT!  Really, I'm not anything like him.  Different style, different ambitions--I'm not well known as a knight yet, but I'm doing well at the moment, and I'm so tired of people saying it!

Lady Enid (laughing):  All right, I understand.  No names mentioned.  [librarian’s husband Sir Geraint enters]  Why, Geraint, have you heard Mordred’s news?  Arthur has acknowledged him as his own son, and is going to make him regent.

Sir Geraint:  Going to be the next Sir Lancelot, are you?

my father in law  Merlin   [anyway someone who SHOULD KNOW BETTER]:  Well, Mordred, I really admired your last book sword work in that duel.  Not that I know anything about books sword work.  But let’s be honest, you’ll never be another Sir Lancelot, will you!  [pause]  Not that I’ve ever read seen Sir Lancelot’s sword work.
Mordred:  yes.  no.  well.

--------------------------

To each of these jovial remarks, I--who am I, anyway?--I answer in my head: If I woke up one morning and discovered that I had turned into Sir Lancelot I would have to POISON MYSELF.

No, seriously, seriously now, I ask myself this question.  I ask it again and again, when I am most consumed with envy and thwarted ambition.  Would you rather be Sir Lancelot, or Arthur’s own son?  And I swear, if I die in ignominy and hatred and no one remembers me or cares, if I never accomplish another deed in my life, the answer is always, and forever, I would rather be Arthur’s son.

Am I going to be the next Lancelot?  No.  But I would sell my soul to be the next Arthur.

Comments

[marith.livejournal.com]

*applause* Also, I smack all those well-meaning people with a large wet salmon.

[rainbowjehan.livejournal.com]

It absolutely is NOT RIGHT how much I laughed while I was reading this. Ohdear.

And--yes. It is unbelievably true that you are Arthur's son. Something that buoys me up in looking at your covers assures me.

[ewein2412]

hee hee hee. thank you.

[ewein2412]

it's inherited memory, I think.

[rainbowjehan.livejournal.com]

Fair enough.

[ewein2412]

In actual fact the question that I ask myself again and again is "Would you rather be [any number of great writers] or would you rather have written The Sunbird?" And the answer is always, well, you know.

[mhari.livejournal.com]

*snarfle* *snort*

I heart you lots. And your alter ego. :D

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

There is a vast difference between marketability and talent.

[ewein2412]

I wrote it for you, really. (tongue in cheek, of course)

[ewein2412]

all I do is whine. But it's much more fun pretending to be someone else when you're whining!

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

Nah, it's not whining... ;o)

I seriously don't think I 'd want to be JK Rowling or Philip Pullman....

[ewein2412]

I did not mention a single name.

But I think JKR must live a very strange and sequestered life. Pullman I envy somewhat in that he lives in Oxford...

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

Names? What names?

Oxford might be nice....now that I think about it. ;o)

[sdn.livejournal.com]

for the record, folks, that editor is not me.

[rachelmanija.livejournal.com]

I often feel the same way, even though I mostly don't write fantasy, so you would think people would not literally compare me to J. K. Rowling Lancelot, but they do anyway.

I really do think I'd rather be Mordred, though. I always loved him best, even before I read The Winter Prince.

[rainbowjehan.livejournal.com]

Considering that I loathe the Harry Potter books and never enjoyed The Golden Compass series, or, for that matter, much of any series other than Diana Wynne Jones and yours--these being the two exceptions to my I HATE SERIES rule--

In any case, I think the question needs to be at least moderately rephrased, as you are a great writer.

[sarah-prineas.livejournal.com]

Oh my gawwwwd. I've been asked that question many times already! And I don't even know how to use a sword!

[tiboribi.livejournal.com]

I will always remember you, and your books. And so will the various friends I have gotten to read them.

But I understand. I would rather produce fantastic art than flash in the pan pop-art.

[sovay]

those ghastly little traps

"I cannot wait to rush in where angels fear to go."

Am I going to be the next Lancelot? No. But I would sell my soul to be the next Arthur.

I think you have your priorities on straight.

[ewein2412]

how could it be you, woman? that was a rejection letter. you PUBLISH my books!

[ewein2412]

when I remind myself of my role I always feel so much better. And I say again, I named NO NAMES!!! hee. Funny how nobody fell for that thin disguise.

[ewein2412]

welcome to Camelot, Perceval.

[ewein2412]

truth to tell, I was writing as Mordred there.

[ewein2412]

I take no credit for my priorities. They just came that way. And... well, the metaphor just fits so damn well.

"I cannot wait to rush in where angels fear to go."

that was the other quotation I nearly used...

[ewein2412]

part of the reason I didn't mention any names was because, well, people DO admire Lancelot. You have to admire Lancelot, whether you like him or not. And I do admire Lancelot.

just... I'm not Lancelot.

(But thank you. ♥)