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shameless commercialism, reprise
Nov. 14th, 2011 09:33 am"I reckon if there's anything you ought a know about cooking, it's this."
"That's just lard, ain't it?"
"No, it ain't just lard," I say. "It's the most important invention in the kitchen since jarred mayonnaise."
"What's so special about" - she wrinkles her nose at it - "pig fat?"
"Ain't pig, it's vegetable." Who in this world doesn't know what Crisco is? "You don't have a clue of all the things you can do with this here can."
She shrugs. "Fry?"
"Ain't just for frying. You ever get a sticky something stuck in your hair, like gum?" I jackhammer my finger on the Crisco can. "That's right, Crisco. Spread this on a baby's bottom, you won't even know what diaper rash is." I plop three scoops in the black skillet. "Shoot, I seen ladies rub it under they eyes and on they husband's scaly feet."
"Look how pretty it is," she says. "Like white cake frosting."
"Clean the goo from a price tag, take the squeak out a door hinge. Lights get cut off, stick a wick in it and burn it like a candle."
I turn on the flame and we watch it melt down in the pan. "And after all that, it'll still fry your chicken."
--Kathryn Stockett, The Help
...The secret ingredient to whoopie pie filling and all commercial cake frosting in the USA! I have to mail order mine. This passage must be an utter mystery to Waterstones and Tesco bookbuying readers. "Who in the world doesn't know what Crisco is?"
(I knew she was going to talk about Crisco from the first sentence. Although, to be honest, I did not use it in my own cooking till I began making whoopie pies.)
"That's just lard, ain't it?"
"No, it ain't just lard," I say. "It's the most important invention in the kitchen since jarred mayonnaise."
"What's so special about" - she wrinkles her nose at it - "pig fat?"
"Ain't pig, it's vegetable." Who in this world doesn't know what Crisco is? "You don't have a clue of all the things you can do with this here can."
She shrugs. "Fry?"
"Ain't just for frying. You ever get a sticky something stuck in your hair, like gum?" I jackhammer my finger on the Crisco can. "That's right, Crisco. Spread this on a baby's bottom, you won't even know what diaper rash is." I plop three scoops in the black skillet. "Shoot, I seen ladies rub it under they eyes and on they husband's scaly feet."
"Look how pretty it is," she says. "Like white cake frosting."
"Clean the goo from a price tag, take the squeak out a door hinge. Lights get cut off, stick a wick in it and burn it like a candle."
I turn on the flame and we watch it melt down in the pan. "And after all that, it'll still fry your chicken."
--Kathryn Stockett, The Help
...The secret ingredient to whoopie pie filling and all commercial cake frosting in the USA! I have to mail order mine. This passage must be an utter mystery to Waterstones and Tesco bookbuying readers. "Who in the world doesn't know what Crisco is?"
(I knew she was going to talk about Crisco from the first sentence. Although, to be honest, I did not use it in my own cooking till I began making whoopie pies.)